I had just thought that maybe if I played like Johnny wasn't dead it wouldn't hurt so much
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
Don't remember how Johnny was your buddy, don't remember that he didn't want to die.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
Dally didn't die a hero. He died violent and young and desperate, just like we all knew he'd die someday.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
even as I begged silently--- Please, not him... not him and Johnny both ---I knew he would be dead, because Dally Winston wanted to be dead and he always got what he wanted.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
He was dead before he hit the ground. But I knew that was what he wanted
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
How can I take it? I wondered. Dally is tougher than I am. Why can I take it when Dally can't? And then I knew. Johnny was the only thing Dally loved. And now Johnny was gone.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
And this time my dreaming worked. I convinced myself that he wasn't dead.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
You read about people looking peacefully asleep when they're dead, but they don't. Johnny just looked dead.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
"Stay gold, Ponyboy. Stay gold..." The pillow seemed to sink a little, and Johnny died.
highlandjeffereyhar citerati fjol
He kept calling for Dallas and Ponyboy. If he lived... If? Please, no, I thought. Please not "if."