How to Date Men When You Hate Men

Says Barthes: “I thought I was suffering from not being loved, and yet it is because I thought I was loved that I was suffering; I lived in the complication of supposing myself simultaneously loved and abandoned.” Like: as an act of charity I decided to become obsessed with you when I could tell you were secretly and shyly into me.

So in practice, when a man who is otherwise a Good, Hot Ally is dismissive of a feminist point or makes a joke that is kind of fucked up, you file in your head to try to change him later and remind yourself that LA LA LA he is tall and good with kids

Do we have free will in dating, or am I always just mimicking something I saw on TV?