Spiritual Partnership

The tools that are necessary to pull the weeds and cultivate the flowers in your garden are emotional awareness, responsible choice, intuition, and trust in the Universe. The more you use them, the more you create authentic power. When creating authentic power is your highest priority, you use them continually.

Spiritual partners help one another discover and explore them. Spiritual partners give one another permission to experience frightened parts of their personalities and heal them and loving parts of their personalities and cultivate them. They are fellow travelers bound for the same destination, each responsible for the journey, and each committed to completing it.

Spiritual partners support one another in experiencing their emotions (frightened and loving parts of their personalities), and while they are experiencing their emotions they make choices that will create the most constructive consequences possible.

As our spiritual partnership developed, I realized that my interactions with Linda were changing me in ways that I had always wanted. It took discipline that I did not know I had—and often didn’t—but I was determined to change everything in myself that had caused me so much pain and loneliness, along with everything that I didn’t like when I saw it in others.

We applied emotional awareness when we were upset—scanning for physical sensations in our bodies that tell us when a frightened part of the personality is active (they are painful) and when a loving part is active (they feel good). We noticed our thoughts that tell us when a frightened part of the personality is active (they are judgmental, critical, etc.) and when a loving part is active (they are thoughts of gratitude, appreciation, care, etc.). If my thoughts were judgmental, violent, or addictively sexual, for example, I knew that a frightened part of my personality was active. We examined our intentions that tell us when a frightened part of the personality is active (it intends to win, to be right, to control—in other words, to pursue external power), and when a loving part is active (it intends to create harmony, cooperate, share, and revere Life). If my intention was to dominate, to be right, or to prove Linda wrong, for example, I knew that a frightened part of my personality was active. Then I chose an intention to create a constructive consequence instead of the destructive consequences that I knew the intention of the frightened part of my personality would create (this is a responsible choice).
I chose to listen, for example, instead of speak; to understand instead of demand to be understood; to be patient instead of hurried, and so on. Whatever I chose, it was different and often opposite from what the frightened part of my personality would have chosen (and wanted very much to do in that moment)—such as justify myself, explain myself, shut Linda off, hurry through our interaction, withdraw, or shout.

Spiritual partners crave meaning. They explore together what it is and how to create it. They observe what attracts them and what repulses them, what keeps them separate and what connects them, and they help one another to grow spiritually.

Your scale does not compare or even register characteristics of personalities. It shows you whether you are relating to a personality or to a soul. All personalities are unique, and so none are equal. Some are strong and some are weak, some are young and some are old, some are wealthy and some are poor, and so on. When you perceive an individual as a personality, your tray rises or falls. When you perceive an individual as a soul, the trays on your scale are level.
You cannot be almost equal. The difference between equality and inequality is the difference between love and fear. When a frightened part of your personality assesses the external power of other personalities, your tray rises or sinks. Loving parts of your personality do not judge, and your scale is balanced.
Equality is the perception that nothing in the Universe is more precious than you and nothing in the Universe is less precious than you.

Feeling inferior and feeling superior are red lights. They are signals to stop, take time to consider what a frightened part of your personality that feels superior (or a frightened part of your personality that feels inferior) has created in the past, and ask yourself if you want to create it again. How many collisions do you want to experience before you learn to recognize a red light?

Inferiority and superiority are experiences of frightened parts of your personality. Some situations activate frightened parts of your personality that feel inferior, and others stimulate frightened parts of your personality that feel superior. For example, when you put someone on a pedestal (idolize her) you feel inferior to that person, but when she fails to meet your expectations (this always happens) she falls off the pedestal (you feel superior to her). The idol and pedestal are your creations. When you see your idol as a person like you, one illusion (you are inferior) disappears and another illusion (you are superior) replaces it. On the other hand, if you discover that someone you did not consider important (for example, a homeless person) can be very helpful to you (he is actually an eccentric billionaire), the reverse happens. The illusion that you are superior (he does not warrant your attention) is replaced by the illusion that you are inferior (your attention is drawn to him magnetically).

When you respond instead of react, you engage the dragon directly, and the more often you do, the more its power over you diminishes until it disappears